Deadlock Series: Deadlock Simplex Gaiden – Translation

Deadlock Series (10)

Title: Deadlock Simplex Gaiden (デッドロック外伝 SIMPLEX) (drama review)
Cast: Yusa Kouji x Toochika Kouichi (遊佐浩二x遠近孝一)
Related drama(s): Deadlock Series
Contents: Track 1
Track 2
Track 3
Track 4
Track 5
Track 6
Track 7
Track 8

Track 1

Rob: Now then, the pasta is up next. Yuuto, I’m glad that you’re helping me.
Yuuto: It’s fine, Rob, I’m free today anyway. Since it’s your birthday party, we can’t have the main lead do all the work.
Rob: Thank you. Then, can you de-vein the prawns next?
Rob: Huh? De-vein?
Yuuto: Wait, you’ve been living for 29 years and you don’t even know about de-veining a prawn?
Rob: I know… but it’s just that I don’t do all these things consciously so I don’t know how to do it.
Yuuto: Then, I’ll teach you. See, this is how you do it.
Rob: Is that so? Then isn’t that easy? Oh, that’s right. Dick said that he’s bringing a colleague along and he asked if you would mind.
Yuuto: He’s very welcome to, the more the merrier for the party.
Rob: It’s been about half a year since Yuuto and Dick started living together. Yuuto became part of the LAPD, Dick started working at a bodyguard company which guards celebrities. But, as he’s been troubled with the frequent invites to bed by his clients, Dick is currently working as instructor for the bodyguards. Being too good-looking has its troubles too.
But, it sure is rare for Dick to bring a good friend along. How is he like?
Yuuto: He is of Russian descent, 27 years old, I met him before when Dick brought him home. Hm… he’s the shy type?
Rob: If he’s an employee at that company, he should be a good-looking one. Aren’t you worried?
Yuuto: Dick won’t cheat on me.
Rob: But won’t you get a little curious? Making that sort of thing clear is important.
Yuuto: I’m grateful for your advice. But having such a conversation in the kitchen makes me feel like a newly-wed daughter getting tips on how to clean the house from her mother. (Both laughs) I will look stupid if I get jealous over any and every single such case.
Rob: Isn’t that fine? “Love is being stupid together” was what the poet Paul Valery said. Also, he also said this “Like rowing a boat on the sea, people enter their future while back-facing it. What’s reflected in their eyes is only the past, nobody knows what tomorrow brings.”
Yuuto: What meaningful words.
Rob: Dick and Yuuto will be all right, they got together after overcoming that many obstacles after all. No matter what happens, their relationship won’t break.
Rob: Neto, Tonya, are you having fun? This salad is delicious too so please have some.
Neto: Yea, I’ll have some.
Tonya: Happy birthday, professor. Any thoughts about turning 30?
Rob: Let me see… nowadays I’ve been increasingly talking to myself. I don’t want to grow older!
Paco: Say, Yuuto, isn’t Dick coming?
Yuuto: Yea Paco, he’s coming soon. He said that he’s bringing one of his colleagues along.
Mike: Sensei, this pasta is delicious! You should just quit your job and become a chef.
Rob: That’s right Mike, if evil ever perishes from this world, I will change my job to become a cook. By the way, those prawns were peeled by Yuuto.
Yuuto: I also de-veined them.
Rob: That’s right. (Doorbell rings) Oh, it’s finally time for Dick to arrive. Oh it’s fine Yuuto, I’ll go get it. (Rob opens door) You’re late, handsome boy.
Dick: Rob, I’m sorry for being late. I brought along one of my close friends…
Rob: Yea, I heard from Yuuto. He’s your colleague right? He’s more than welcome to join us.
Dick: Joshua.
Joshua: Pleased to meet you. I’m Joshua Brad, I’m sorry for imposing on you suddenly.
Rob: Yo, welcome. I’m Rob Conners, welcome to my birthday party.
Wow, wow. He’s unbelievably good-looking. But…
Could it be, that we’ve met before?
Joshua: No, this is our first meeting.
Rob: You’re right. Come, please enter.
I knew it, it was just my imagination. If he’s such a good looker, I wouldn’t have forgotten him after meeting him once too.

Deadlock Series (17)

Tonya: Joshua, why did you become a bodyguard?
Joshua: As I was working at a security post previously, I thought it would be good to work at somewhere where I’ve previous experience in.
Mike: Those rich people must be selfish, isn’t it tough to accommodate them?
Joshua: No, not particularly.
Rob: It’s not cute to be that unsociable, to think that he can’t even carry conversations… Since it’s come to this, I shall be the one to make him laugh. First, let him drink something…
Joshua, how about some wine?
Joshua: No thank you, I don’t drink.
Rob: I see, I’m sorry about that.
What a tough one, if that’s the case, I shall tame him with my cooking!
Dick: Don’t hold back, just eat. Rob’s cooking is delicious.
Joshua: Thank you, Dick.
Rob: Joshua, have some of this meat loaf too.
Joshua: Mr Conners, I’m sorry but I can’t eat meat.
Rob: I-is that so? (softly) It was one of my signature dishes too.
So my plan to win him over with food failed too huh?
(Doorbell rings) Who can it be? Everyone is here already.
Tonya: Rob, who rang the doorbell?
Rob: Well, I went out but there wasn’t anyone. Instead, this box was left on the porch.
Yuuto: Could it be your birthday present?
Rob: Probably so, it’s wrapped up wrapping paper. “To my beloved Rob, happy birthday. I’m giving you a special gift, I sincerely hope that you will be happy with it. From your old friend” is what it says.
Tonya: Perhaps it’s from an old lover? Say, Rob, open it!
Paco: It might even be a jack-in-the-box. Beware, everyone! A toy snake might jump out from the box.
Yuuto: There’s a possibility of that.
Rob: What a terrible pair of brothers. Let me make this clear, I’ve never broken up with anyone in a bad way before. I always say goodbye in a satisfactory way.  (Rob starts opening package)
Tonya: I wonder what it is, could it be food?
Rob: I wished that he fussed more over… huh?
Tonya: What, no!
Mike: What’s that?! An… ear…? It can’t be…
Rob: An ear which has been cut off… a typewritten letter… It’s the same, as back then.
Yuuto, call the police. The owner of this ear has probably been killed.
Yuuto: How do you know that?
Rob: The same thing has happened before. A psycho who has gone crazy sent the ears of women he killed over to me. That person is a serial killer who’s killed an estimated number of nine women.
Yuuto: Could you be talking about the ear-chopper Thomas?
Rob: Yea. The way this has been done is exactly the same as that case. Goodness, this is really the best birthday.
Paco: Rob, I’ll be leaving for tonight. It’s late too, I’ll gather more information tomorrow.
Rob: I understand, Paco. Even though this was supposed to be enjoyable, it became work for you. I’m really sorry.
Paco: What are you talking about? It isn’t your fault. It looks like that ear was severed after the victim’s death. The detailed analysis should be out tomorrow. That, about Thomas Keller…
Rob: Oh, how was it?
Ear-chopper Thomas Keller. He’s a serial killer whose appalling murders shook the foundation of precedent cases. After he kidnapped the nine women and killed them by strangulation, he cut off both of their ears in order to complete his collection. After his arrest, as he maintained absolute silence, three of the corpses have yet to be found till today.
Paco: Thomas Keller was at the Texas state prison for a period of time before being transferred to a Californian prison, Madras prison a year ago.
Rob: Madras prison? That’s near. Don’t tell me Keller broke out from prison…
Paco: No. He’s still being kept in the isolation cell in that prison.
Rob: In that case, it’s probably a copycat.
Yuuto: Paco, I’m worried about Rob. Can’t you attach police as guards to him?
Rob: Yuuto, there’s no need for that. I can feel the provocation from the culprit, but he shouldn’t come into direct contact with me.
That’s right, for now.
Paco, like the previous case, I think the victim for this case should be a young western girl with blonde hair. The culprit has copied Keller’s movements totally.
Paco: And that means?
Rob: First, it’s the letter. Keller used a typewriter too. Even the contents of the letter are similar. He wrote this “To my beloved Rob, I’m giving you a special gift. It’s part of my precious collection, I sincerely hope that you’ll be happy with it.” See? Isn’t it exactly the same?
Paco: Are you a man who will be liked by criminals? Why did Keller send those ears to you?
Rob: Previously, at the request of a publisher, I wrote an article about Keller’s case. I made an inference on the criminal’s profile and motive. Keller read it and misunderstood that I’m someone who understands him very well.
Paco: I see… tell me more details tomorrow. Mike and I will return to the station for now.
Rob: Yea, see you tomorrow. I’m sorry to everyone too, I’ve involved everyone in an unpleasant strife.
Tonya: Don’t worry about it, aren’t we friends?
Yuuto: Thank you, Tonya. But I’m still worried, Rob isn’t one to carry guns around… Say, Dick, can I get you to guard Rob for a while?
Dick: I don’t mind, I can make arrangements with my company and tomorrow…
Joshua: Dick, please let me handle Mr Conners’ case.
Dick: Joshua… But weren’t you supposed to be on break from tomorrow onwards?
Joshua: For Mr Conners’ case, it will be unrelated to the company, and I’d like to handle it as a personal matter. Mr Conners, will you hire me? I don’t need any payment.
Rob: That is… but… I’m grateful for that, but there’s no reason for you to go to such lengths for me. Ah, could it be that you fell for me at first sight? Seems like that isn’t the case, but…
Yuuto: Since Joshua has said that, why don’t you just let him be your bodyguard for now?
Dick: Rob, Joshua might be still young, but his skills are good. Please hire him.
Rob: Even Dick… I got it. Then, Joshua, can I ask you to be my bodyguard for now?
Joshua: Yes. Then from tonight, please let me stay with you.
Rob: Huh? Are you going to stay here too?
Tonya: Well, since Joshua has to make his preparations as well, why don’t you start the guarding tomorrow? You can get Neto to stay over tonight. Neto, that’s fine right? Until Joshua arrives tomorrow, you can be the stand-in bodyguard.
Neto: I don’t mind.
Rob: Then, Neto, as a bodyguard cum housekeeper, can I leave the cleaning up to you too?
Neto: Goodness. For the professor’s sake, I shall go wash some dishes now.

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Track 2

Rob: Why now, after all these while…
Joshua: Mr Conners, how about some coffee?
Rob: Sounds good. Then, can you drink it with me? Sit down opposite me.
Joshua: Is that an order?
Rob: No, I just invited you to because I thought it will be more enjoyable than drinking it alone. If you don’t want to, you can just reject me. I don’t intend to force you to do anything.
Joshua: Please excuse me. (Joshua sits down)
Rob: Joshua, I’m sorry for saying with a complaining tone.
Joshua: No, it can’t be helped that you felt uncomfortable with my attitude, because I’m someone who can’t even smile out of courtesy and I’m a boring man.
Rob: I wasn’t uncomfortable, it felt a little stifling though.
Really, what an answer from a man who can’t accept jokes. But he’s really a serious man. He’s doing his best as my guard too.
I have a favour to ask of you though, can you call me Rob? I don’t like to be so formal. Ah, just to make it clear, this isn’t an order. It’s just a request.
Joshua: I understand. Then, Rob, I have a few requests to make too, as your guard.
Rob: What is it?
Joshua: Earlier, when we went out to buy things, you tried to walk in front of me. Also, you got off immediately from the car. Actions like that will trouble me.
Rob: I understand, even when I’m entering the toilet in my house, regardless of how urgent it is, I won’t enter until you tell me it’s all right to.
He didn’t even crack a smile huh? Okay baby, you’re definitely a hard-core man of steel.
Say, Joshua. I understand that you’re giving your best, but I don’t think there’s a need to get so nervous. I’m not a president who received a threat of assassination…
Joshua: Even during times of peace, the president won’t get off the car before the secret servicemen.
Rob: You’re speaking as though you’ve actually guarded the president before.
Joshua: I didn’t guard him before, but I’ve met him several times during work. Because I was in charge of guarding the vice president’s family until autumn last year.
Rob: I’m surprised, were you in the secret service? Why did you quit?
Joshua: It was due to personal reasons.
Rob: I see. Have you gotten used to life in LA?
Joshua: Yes, because I used to live here until I was ten.
Rob: What a coincidence, I used to teach university classes in DC for a period of time too. At first, I couldn’t take the cold weather there. But when spring came and the cherry blossoms blossomed, I started to think that it’s the best city ever. Have you gone for the cherry blossoms festival before too?
Joshua: Yes… I liked walking around in the Smithsonian district. When I feel like it, I’ll drop by the zoo too.
Rob: Really? I used to visit it too. The panda couple was so cute… I wonder why pandas are so entertaining? The way they hold the bamboo with both paws and chew on it, they’re just so cute that I can’t stand it. (Rob mimics pandas)
Joshua: (Joshua laughs) Excuse me.
Rob: Did I look that foolish?
Joshua: No, I’m sorry for laughing.
Rob: I don’t mind, because I’ve been thinking about making you laugh since yesterday. Now then, I’ve done what I’ve set out to do, it looks like we can talk better now. Now, may I ask you a question?
Joshua: What is it?
Rob: Why did you volunteer to be my bodyguard? Don’t tell me, did you know one of the women who were Thomas Keller’s victims?
Joshua: Ah… how…
Rob: How did I figure that out? It’s the same as profiling. From the information I’ve gotten, I leave only the most relevant ones and narrow my suspicions down.
Joshua: It’s just as you’ve said. My sister was killed by Thomas Keller.
Rob: You sister? Is your sister Sherry Mohan? I see… that’s why I felt like I’ve seen you before… You look exactly like your sister.
Joshua: Did you remember my sister?
Rob: Yea, I really pitied your sister. At the very least, I wished that her body could be returned to her family.
Joshua: I heard that you met up with Keller after his arrest and tried desperately to persuade him to divulge the location of the three remaining victims’ bodies.
Rob: Something like that did happen, but why do you know that?
Joshua: My brother-in-law’s uncle was a policeman in my hometown. He was also part of the investigation so he let me collect quite a bit of information in private.
Rob: I see. Then, can I hear your final answer soon? Why my bodyguard?
Joshua: It’s my gratitude towards you for guiding that case towards its closure. Also, my feelings of not being able to forgive the cowardly culprit who’s mimicking Keller’s crime. Can’t it be just these two reasons?
Rob: I got it, I’m satisfied now. Once again, I’ll be counting on you.
Joshua: Good morning, I got coffee for myself.
Rob: Oh, help yourself to whatever you want. You haven’t had your breakfast yet right? I’ll prepare it now.
Joshua: I’m fine, I also have only coffee in the mornings. What’s your plan for today?
Rob: I have a lecture in the university in the afternoon.
Joshua: Do you mind if I stay by your side during the lecture?
Rob: I don’t mind… (phone rings) Oh, I have a call. (Rob picks call up) Hello Paco, thank you for yesterday. Huh? O-oh is that so… Yea, I got it. I’ll be fine, Joshua is together with me too. Call me again if you find out more. Bye then. (Rob hangs up)
Joshua: They found the victim?
Rob: Yea, the owner of that ear was Anna Jackson. She’s a westerner and blonde. Her cause of death was, as expected, strangulation. Just like the times when Keller sent me those ears, Anna was a 19-year-old student.
Joshua: Yesterday, you talked about the culprit with Paco right?
Rob: Oh, that? It was just based on assumptions. The culprit knows too much about this case from the past. If I speculate recklessly, the culprit should be someone involved in the investigations back then, or someone whom Keller is close to. That is because, after being arrested, Keller maintained absolute silence and hasn’t spoken to anyone during these past five years. Of course, he hasn’t had contact with any external parties at all.
Joshua: If it’s someone involved in the past, why would he repeat the same offense five years later?
Rob: I’m puzzling over that too. If it’s just a copycat, it won’t be that abnormal. But if it’s the work of someone who’s been involved in that case, I totally don’t understand his motive for making such a thing happen right now.
Joshua: You’re right. In any case, the culprit’s aim is… (doorbell rings)
Man: Good day, Mr Conners. You have an express delivery parcel.
Rob: Express delivery? Don’t tell me…
Letter: To my beloved Rob, I’m sure you were delighted with my present. Did you feel nostalgic when you recalled the past? I intend to do the same for the next time too. This time, I will bring both together to make a collection. When you line them up together, it will become a beautiful shape of a heart right? From your old friend.
Rob: Damn it, this is a crime alert.
Joshua: This copycat wants to do all he can to sound like the original.
Rob: Yea, he must be quite deranged. How far does the culprit intend to mimic?

Deadlock Series (18)

Rob: It’s already this time huh? I have to hurry back.
Keller: Yo Rob, I’m sorry for scaring you. I had some matters with you so I waited for you inside the car. I wanted your ears… hey did you know? If you stick two ears which have been cut off together, it becomes a heart shape. That’s why, even though I really wanted both ears, I’ll be satisfied with just one side. Because I don’t want to be hated by you. (Rob struggles and hit the horn)
Rob: Huh? Was it a dream? I see, while I was caught up in my thoughts on the sofa, I fell asleep. It’s all right, I still have my ears.
Joshua: Rob? What’s wrong?
Rob: No it’s nothing, I just had a nightmare and remembered the past.
Joshua: Could it be the time when you were attacked by Keller?
Rob: Did you know about that too?
Joshua: I don’t know the details, but I heard that Keller attacked you and was arrested. Did that man try to kill you?
Rob: Keller hid in my car. I got onto the driver’s seat without noticing anything and was strangled from the back. My ear was nearly cut off. Fortunately, there was a policeman nearby and I was saved. Although my ear was a third cut off, thanks to the work of a talented surgeon, it’s all right now. A scar still remains though. Seems like Keller really wanted my ear no matter what. To be loved to that extent, I’m not sure if I should be honoured or frightened… Until today, I still don’t understand why he was so obsessed with other people’s ears.
Joshua: If you don’t mind, can you show me the scar on your ear?
Rob: I don’t mind.
Joshua: (Joshua touches the scar) Did that hurt?
Rob: A little.
Joshua: (Joshua tears) I’m sorry.
Rob: It’s all right, you must have remembered about your sister. Sit here. If you hold your tears in when you’re sad, it’s not good for your body. By crying, humans expel the stress out of their bodies. That’s why, when you are sad, just cry. It isn’t an embarrassing thing to cry when you think about someone precious to you.
Joshua: Rob… I…
Rob: You really loved Sherry, didn’t you?
Joshua: My sister will talk to me in my dreams, with a sad voice. “Joshua, find me”. In Sherry’s grave, there is no body. There’s only an ear there. I have a feeling that till today, my sister’s soul can’t go to heaven and is still wandering around in the darkness.
Rob: The dead can’t mourn or speak of their regrets. That’s why those who were left behind will imagine, about the dead’s pain, sorrow and frustrations. And unknowingly, they will start to bear a heavy burden.
Joshua, let’s meet Keller tomorrow. I don’t think he will speak, but I think it’s something that has to be done. Do you want to come too?
Joshua: Yes, please let me accompany you.
Rob: Mike, judging from your expression, seems like there weren’t any results.
Mike: That’s right, sensei. That was a total gone case, right Paco?
Paco: Yea, as expected, Keller didn’t say a single word. It seems difficult to get a clue from him. What would you do, Rob?
Rob: Of course I’ll meet him. Joshua, come here. Are you all right?
Joshua: Yes.
Rob: Say, Thomas. Can you tell me? The copycat seems to be someone who knows you very well. Do you have any idea who the culprit might be? (Thomas laughs)
Paco: Rob, stop it already. No matter how many times you ask him, it will be useless. This man won’t answer to anything.
Rob: Seems like it. Thomas, I’ll get going. (Thomas laughs) Huh? What about the ear? Could it be that you still want my ear? You are really a strange one, there’s nothing special about my ears. Also, to think that putting two ears side by side would make a heart shape, why would you have such an eccentric idea…
I see, is that it? Hey Rob Conners, have your brain cells aged already? Why did you overlook such an important fact? There’s got to be a limit to how idiotic you can be!
Paco: Rob, what’s wrong?
Rob: Paco, Keller knows who the culprit is.
Paco: What did you say?
Rob: I’ll tell you the reason later. Say, Thomas, seems like the copycat is your acquaintance. That person knows everything about your crime, that’s because you told him about everything in detail. I hope that you can tell me that person’s identity before the next victim appears. If you would tell it to me, I don’t mind giving you my ear.
Joshua: Rob! What did you just say?
Rob: Wait a minute. I have another condition to set, out of the victims you’ve killed, there are three whose bodies have yet to be found. I want to know the location where you’ve hid those girls. Who the copycat is, and the location of the three bodies. If you would tell me the truth about these two things, I will gift you with my ear, but just one side. When you feel like making the exchange, contact me. Got it? (Thomas laughs)
Joshua: Rob! To set out such conditions to an exchange like that, you’re crazy!
Rob: I couldn’t think of anything other than that, don’t get so angry, you’re spoiling your handsome face.
Paco: Explain yourself, Rob. How did you know that the copycat is someone who’s close to Keller?
Rob: It’s the letter from the copycat. In that letter, “heart shape” was written in right? Previously when I was attacked by Keller, I heard the same phrase from his mouth. “If you put two ears together, you get a heart shape”.
Mike: And what of it?
Rob: I haven’t told anyone about the heart shape idea, not even the investigators. After his arrest, Keller also maintained his silence. After he was imprisoned, he didn’t talk to anyone either. In other words, you get it right?
Paco: This means that Keller spoke to the copycat. Is that it?
Rob: Yea. Something like putting two ears together to get a heart shape, nobody would think of that under normal circumstances right? The copycat heard about it from Keller, that’s why it was carelessly written in the letter.
Paco: If that’s the case, is the culprit an acquaintance from when he lived in Virginia?
Rob: Or perhaps, an inmate whom he got to know in prison. But he was isolated, so the chances of that are low. Paco, can you get some information from a guard who knows Keller well?
Paco: All right, I’ll try asking.
Rob: Mr Mayfield, Mr Williams, I’m sorry for troubling you. When Keller is in his isolation cell, what does he usually do?
Mayfield: Keller usually draws. Oh, he had a sketchbook, would you like to have a look?
Rob: Some pages have been torn out here and there…
Mayfield: Oh, when Keller drew something he liked… that… seems like he would eat it. Right, Colin? You saw it a few times.
Williams: Yes, he wouldn’t stop even when told to.
Rob: During the past year, were there any changes to Keller’s behaviour?
Williams: There isn’t any notable change. Keller was a docile man, to the extent that it’s hard to believe that he committed such a crime.
Rob: Is that so… I have a request to ask of both of you. If he exhibits any signs of wanting to contact me, please call me immediately at this number on my name card. I’ll be counting on you.
Mike: After that, we have to investigate on his acquaintances in Virginia. If we don’t get a clue soon, this case will be taken over by those bastards from FBI.
Paco: Yea, when the next victim appears, this will definitely be under FBI’s jurisdiction.
Rob: Joshua, are you all right?
Joshua: About what?
Rob: You’re angry. If I can save someone’s life with just one of my ears, it’s a small price to pay.
Mike: Huh? Were you serious?
Rob: Yea, if Keller told the truth, I will go to the hospital and undergo the surgery. Will you deliver my ear to Keller then, Mike?
Mike: No, I refuse to. I will tie you up by coiling a rope around you, and I won’t let you do something like that. Huh? What’s that, there seems to be an awful lot of people gathered around the front of your house, sensei.
Paco: Seems like it’s the media.
Reporter 1: You’re professor Conners right? The copycat of the Keller case sent the victim’s ear to you, is there a reason for that?
Reporter 2: Did the copycat leave you any message?
Reporter 3: What were your feelings when you saw the victim’s ear?
Paco: What a persistent bunch. Mike, where did the information leaked out from?
Mike: I wonder. I’ll have to find out who that loose-lipped fellow is after I get back to the station.
Paco: Rob, I’m sorry. It’s our fault.
Rob: It’s all right, Paco. It was rather strange that it hasn’t been leaked out to the media till now.
Mike: But if you think about it, isn’t it safer if the media sticks around sensei?
Joshua: It’s the opposite, what can we do if the culprit pretends to be a reporter and gets close to Rob? Rob, can you not leave your house for the time being? Under such circumstances, there will be some difficulties in my guarding.
Rob: It will be fine, I’m not a blonde beauty.
Joshua: Can you guarantee that the copycat who’s trying to mimic Keller’s actions won’t attack you? I’m begging you, please have more sense of danger!
Rob: I get it, I have a friend who has an apartment in Marina Del Rey. He left the key with me and told me that I can use it any time I wish to. Let’s move there temporarily.

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Track 3

Rob: If it’s here, it should be safe right? The front door is monitored by CCTV and has auto-lock. The balcony is separate from others too.
Joshua: Yes, at least when you’re in the room.
Rob: I’ll be making our dinner, in the meanwhile you can take a shower.
Rob: It would be good if Keller contacts me before the next victim appears, but… Oops, the floor is wet. I have to mop it… ah! (Rob slips and falls)
Joshua: Rob? What’s wrong?
Rob: I’m fine, I just slipped and fell. You can go back to the bathroom.
Joshua: Please don’t scare me.
Rob: Ah, it’s all right. I can clean it up. If you’re dressed like that, you’ll catch a cold.
Joshua: I’m fine. If you’ve hit your head, there are chances that you get dizzy or feel nausea so I’ll stay here for the time being.
Rob: When you’re dressed you looked on the slim side, but looking at you now, as expected, you do work out and have a good body.
Joshua: Is that so?
Rob: Say, haven’t you heard about it from Dick? That I’m gay…
Joshua: I’ve heard.
Rob: In that case, just leave this and return to the bathroom already. I’m sure you don’t want to be leered at by me right?
Joshua: I’m not a woman, there’s nothing to be embarrassed about if you look at me. It’s not like I’ll lose anything, if you want to look, do as you please.
Rob: The problem lies in you not being a woman… (Rob continues to prepare dinner)
Joshua: You too, you liked Yuuto before right? Dick said this before, that you two were once love rivals.
Rob: I’m surprised, for that Dick to talk so much.
We weren’t something as much as love rivals, I was just hovering around the two of them who were in love. That’s all. Joshua, don’t you have a lover?
Joshua: I don’t. I don’t feel the need for that either.
Rob: “The need”, huh? I’m always wishing for a lover, because I think living with the person you love is a hundred times happier than living alone.
Joshua: If it’s you, I’m sure you can have as many lovers as you want, as long as you feel like it right? Since you aren’t doing that, does that mean that you still have feelings for Yuuto?
Rob: You’re scarily straightforward, aren’t you?
Joshua: I’m sorry.
Rob: Yuuto is no longer in the picture. For now, I just don’t feel like having a partner only in bed. I guess I’ve grown old too. Now then, dinner preparations should be done soon. What will you do about your shower?
Joshua: I’ll leave it for later.
Rob: Then, wear some clothes. Eating naked is rather erotic and arousing too, but if I get into the mood and attack you, I think I’ll be sent flying.
Joshua: I won’t punch you and send you flying. Without doing that, I can break your arm and render you motionless.
Rob: That’s wonderful.
Joshua: Thank you for lending me your shower. What is it?
Rob: It’s nothing, just that seeing you wear a T-shirt with short trousers is rather refreshing. Somehow, I thought that you might wear suits to sleep.
Joshua: That can’t be.
Rob: (Phone rings) Yes? Yuuto, what’s wrong?
Yuuto: What do you mean “what’s wrong”?! I heard from Joshua, you set out an absurd exchange with Keller? Despite being a scholar, you’re too reckless! Rob! Are you listening?
Rob: About Keller, it’s not like anything is going to happen now. That’s why, don’t worry. Besides, if we talk about being reckless, aren’t you the one who’s always being reckless? I heard from Paco, you’re doing an undercover investigation right now? Have you been in danger?
Yuuto: I’m fine. Rob, I’m sorry for yelling at you.
Rob: It’s fine, that’s proof that you’re honestly worried about me. I’m happy.
Yuuto: Anyway, I’ll break off our friendship if you do something stupid. I don’t have time right now, I’ll call you again. (Yuuto hangs up)
Rob: Joshua, can you tell me the reason for contacting Yuuto deliberately?
Joshua: Because I thought that if Yuuto stops you, you might reconsider your exchange with Keller.
Rob: Why did you think that?
Joshua: If it’s a request from someone you like, you won’t be able to refuse it that easily.
Rob: I do like Yuuto, but that’s no longer in the romantic way. I said before, I’ve reached a conclusion regarding him.
Joshua: But it’s more effective than my request right?
Rob: Effective? I’m desperately trying to prevent the next appearance of a victim! Any effective ways of changing my resolve can go to hell!
Joshua: I’m sorry. If I wounded your feelings, I apologise. I just wanted to you to reconsider it, no matter what.
Rob: Goodness, what am I doing? Joshua is just worried about me. I wonder why, when I’m with him, my true feelings keeps getting revealed.
I’m sorry, I said it in an unpleasant tone. Yuuto is an important close friend, the same goes for you. Although we’ve just met, I consider you  a close friend. That’s why, I won’t ignore your words and only listen to Yuuto’s words. Please remember that.
Joshua: Yes.
Rob: How about some wine for you? You said that you don’t drink, does that mean you hate alcohol?
Joshua: I don’t hate it, but my alcohol tolerance is low…
Rob: I’m sure one glass is fine, I want you to drink with me for a while. Drinking alone is boring.
Rob: How nostalgic, have you watched this movie before?
Joshua: Yes, if I’m not wrong, Kevin Costner is a skilful bodyguard who protects the famous singer Whitney Housten right?
Rob: Yea, this is the type of romance movie that women would like. Come to think of it, don’t you get invited to bed by your clients like Dick?
Joshua: I might have, but I don’t go beyond the doorstep of my clients’ homes so I don’t cause any misunderstandings.
Rob: That’s the same as saying that Dick is careless you know?
Joshua: I didn’t.
Rob: But, from the way you phrased that just now, strangers who hear you will definitely think that you’re looking down on Dick. Don’t misunderstand me, I’m teasing you. You seem like the kind who would get misunderstood by others, so I just felt like giving you some advice. You can ignore it as an old man’s nonsense.
Joshua: It’s just as you said, I’m always lacking in words. But I definitely do not look down on Dick.  He’s an amazing man.
Rob: I can tell from your attitude that you respect Dick. I’m sure he’s too kind. Although he’s usually cool and blunt, he’s soft-hearted towards the one he loves. He’s the kind who can never reject if someone asks him “Dick, I feel terrible. Please, can you take me to my bed?”
Joshua: (Joshua laughs) You’re right.
Rob: All right, he laughed again. It’s a good change.
Joshua: I remember, the last scene of this movie doesn’t make sense. After his mission ended, this bodyguard left right? If he really loved her, he could have found a way for the two of them to live together. In the end, it means that he didn’t love the other person enough to change his way of life.
Rob: That might be the case. Do you want another glass?
Joshua: Yes.
Rob: Are you all right Joshua? I’m sorry, I didn’t think that you would be so weak against alcohol. You look so young, so cute.
But I don’t want to harbour any strange feelings. Towards someone who’s trying his best to protect me, it’s like betraying him to have impure ulterior motives.
Joshua: Rob…
Rob: What is it? I’m right here. Do you feel bad?
Joshua: I want to protect you.
Rob: Yes, I understand. If it’s you, I’m sure you can protect me perfectly. I believe in you.
Joshua: I shouldn’t have told you about my dreams of Sherry.
Rob: The promise with Keller isn’t your fault, it’s so that we don’t have another victim. It might sound weird if I put it this way, but I won’t make use of your sister’s case.
Joshua: Even so… if you have to cut your ear off, I won’t be able to not blame myself.
Rob: Joshua, I feel responsible for Keller’s case. If only I did better then, the last two girls might not have to die. Also in this current case, the victim might not have been killed by the copycat.
Joshua: You’re wrong, it’s not your responsibility. Don’t blame yourself.
Rob: Thank you. But, I want to give my best within the limits of my abilities. Rather than doing it for anyone else, I’m doing it for myself. I don’t want to regret.
Joshua: You’re a strong man.
Rob: I’m not strong. Because I know that I’m a weak man, I don’t want to shoulder a heavy burden. I had a younger brother. If he were still alive, he should be your age.
Joshua: Why did he die?
Rob: It was a gun discharge accident. Danny wanted to play with me, but I was absorbed in watching TV and didn’t pay any attention to him. He was bored and he found a gun in father’s room… he was only five. I couldn’t stop regretting about it.
Joshua: Rob… (Joshua reaches for Rob and Rob evades)
Rob: No, it’s not like I don’t want to be touched.
Joshua: Then, why?
Rob: Towards a gay like me, it’s dangerous to have physical contact. It’s a different story if you’re prepared to be attacked.
Joshua: Liar, you don’t even have the intention to.
Rob: Why do you think so?
Joshua: Didn’t you say so? For the time being, you don’t want to have a partner only in bed.
Rob: Hm… you got me. But, even if it’s me, I’ll get aroused with impure thoughts if you reach for me carelessly. With that said, I shall leave before I get punched by you. (Rob gets up but Joshua pulls him back)
Joshua: Rob… Please stay here for a while longer.
Rob: Seems like Joshua becomes slightly spoiled when he’s drunk. But men are really weak against the unexpected.
What a bad child, is it so fun to tease me?
Joshua: I’m sorry, it’s because you’re too kind, so I took advantage of that…
Rob: Joshua, before I leave, can I have a goodnight kiss?
Joshua: Yea. (They kiss)
Rob: Is it your first time sharing a kiss with a man? (Joshua nods) If I kiss you once more, will you get angry? (Joshua hugs Rob)
For him to embrace me on his own… I’m not taking responsibility for what happens next.
(Rob kisses Joshua) Joshua… (Joshua falls asleep) Huh?
Is this cute boy the devil?
(Rob laughs) He got me… to fall asleep in the midst of kissing.
But with this, it might be for the better. Joshua isn’t gay, he was just longing for company today. When tomorrow comes, I’ll end it with some slight teasing. I have to end a love which isn’t possible.
Goodnight, Joshua.

Deadlock Series (19)
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Track 4

Rob: Good morning, did you sleep well last night?
Joshua: Yes, straight till the morning. That… I caused you trouble last night, I’m sorry.
Rob: Do you remember everything? Even kissing me?
Joshua: Somewhat…
Rob: Don’t make that expression, that was my fault. To take advantage of a drunkard, I’m the worst. I’m reflecting on it.
Joshua: That is…
Rob: Don’t worry, I won’t do that ever again, I promise you. That’s why, you shouldn’t worry about it.
That’s right, this should be fine. What happened yesterday was a slight mistake…
(Phone rings) Huh? Who is it from? If I’m not wrong this number…
Rob: Mr Williams, you must be tired from your work, I’m sorry. You came by car right? Was the drive all right?
Williams: Yes, thank you for your concern. This is the letter I got from Keller, I haven’t read the contents.
Rob: Oh, thanks. (Rob opens the envelope and reads) A map and an address… the location of the bodies! Joshua, take a look at this. Sherry’s body is somewhere there.
Williams: But, we’re still unsure if it’s the real deal, and whether Keller wrote the truth…
Rob: Yea, I’ll deliver this to Paco and get FBI to investigate on their side. Mr Williams, did Keller pass any other letter to you?
Williams: No there wasn’t any. When I went to do my rounds this morning, he passed this to me without a word.
Rob: Is that so…
That’s strange, he should have known that the exchange won’t be successful without me knowing who the copycat is. Is he putting on airs?
Williams: Then, please excuse me.
Rob: Thank you very much. If anything happens, please contact me any time.
Joshua: I’ll deliver this letter to the LAPD.
Rob: I’ll go with you.
Joshua: No, please wait here. It’s more dangerous to go out.
Rob: I get it, I’ll stay home obediently. But please hurry back as soon as possible, it’s lonely without you honey.
Joshua: I’ll get going.
Rob: Huh? Joshua… wait. Did you get angry because I said something weird? If that’s the case, then I’ll apologise. I’m sorry.
Joshua: Please let go of me!
Rob: Then, turn and face me. Look at me properly.
Joshua: I refuse. I’m not gay!
Rob: Yes, I know that. The kiss yesterday was a mistake, you weren’t at fault, it was all my fault.
Joshua: But… I get concerned about you…
Rob: That’s right… huh?!
Joshua: I look so stupid when I get flustered over every single word you utter. I don’t even know what I should do. Even though I’m not gay, it’s weird right? To have my heart pounding for a man… But…
Rob: I see, he wasn’t angry, he was embarrassed.
Joshua, look at me. You remember bits and pieces of last night’s kiss right? I remember every single detail about it. Your lips were very soft and so sweet that I could swoon.
Joshua: Like I said, I couldn’t remember much…
Rob: That’s right. Then, shall I let you recall it?
Joshua: Please… stop  it… at such a place…
Rob: I refuse. Regardless of where we are, I want to kiss you. If I could bring you to the bed right now and make love to you countless times, how fortunate… ouch! It hurts… let go of me.
Joshua: For now, our priority should be to deliver this letter first.
Rob: Yea, you’re right. But after that, when you return, let’s continue what we were talking about. Although I’m attracted by you, I don’t want you to be a temporary partner. That’s why, I want to have a proper talk with you first. Is that all right?
Joshua: I understand.
Rob: To get so happy over that… I’m naïve too, it’s not like my relationship with Joshua will materialise. But, it’s difficult to imagine the worst when I see the light of hope. Even so, this isn’t a time to worry over love huh? If Keller really doesn’t know the identity of the copycat, this case might drag on. (Doorbells rings) Mr Williams, what’wrong?
Williams: I just recalled, there was someone whom Keller was close to in prison. I thought it might be of use to the investigation.
Rob: Please enter, did you turn back deliberately?
Williams: Yes. After getting onto the car, I remembered it after some time. There was a warden called Morgan who would get violent towards prisoners easily. But he was different towards Keller, he didn’t just not bully him, he gave him special treatment. As though he admired Keller…
Rob: Please take a seat. So, do you know the address of Morgan?
Williams: No… it seems like he moved after resigning.
Rob: Then, can you write his full name and characteristics? I’ll make some tea right away. (Phone rings) Oh please excuse me. Paco, good timing. Joshua is heading over right now, Keller gave the location of the three bodies…
Paco: Rob, it’s bad. Keller drank some toilet detergent and committed suicide!
Rob: What did you just say?!
Paco: He’s currently unconscious and in coma, we don’t even know how he managed to get his hands on the cleaning liquid. Seems like he drank quite a bit of it. The one who contacted me was Mayfield whom we met yesterday. He noticed something strange with Keller after he changed shifts with Williams. Mayfield was lamenting, if only he had noticed it earlier.
Rob: Huh? Did some time pass before Mayfield noticed it?
Paco: Yea, according to the analysis, it had been a few hours after he was poisoned.
Rob: Damn it, the culprit is that man! That man has to be the copy… (Rob is knocked out)
Paco: Rob? Hey, are you listening? Hello? Hello!
Williams: Are you awake?
Rob: How troubling, to think that you were the copycat. We were totally fooled.
Williams: I thought you were an intelligent man, but seems like you weren’t much.
Rob: I agree.
So it’s a knife next? His goal has got to be that. It’s going to be a mess so I wish he would reconsider this, but I can’t resist with my arms and legs tied up. Seems like I’d have to buy time somehow.
So the talk about Morgan was a lie? Was that all about yourself?
Williams: That’s right, there was never a warden named Morgan. The story about him eating his sketches was a lie too, the sketches which were ripped out are all with me.
Rob: Will gathering all those sketches make his autobiography?
Williams: Something like that. When it comes to Keller, I know everything about him. There’s no one else who knows Keller better than I do.
Rob: Why are you mimicking him? What’s your aim?
Williams: He was extremely regretful about not being able to cut off your ear, it was his only regret. That’s why I thought that I would succeed doing what that Thomas Keller wasn’t able to do. By doing that, I will become the true eat-chopper!
Rob: Looks like he’s got a mix of antisocial personality disorder and dependent personality disorder. After reading Keller’s letter, he started experiencing Keller’s crime and over time, started to mimic his way of thinking, behaviour and even his feelings.
Keller didn’t commit suicide right? Did you force the cleaning liquid down him?
Williams: Everything is your fault. Because you brought up the unbelievable exchange, Keller was tempted by it and wrote two sets of letters!
Rob: One was the one you brought to us with the locations of the bodies. Another one the letter telling me about the identity of the copycat. In other words, a letter with your name written in it?
Williams: That’s right, that bastard betrayed me. What ear-chopper?! He’s a mere coward now… I’m much better than that man! I will cut your ear off and show the whole world who the true ear-chopper is! Now, our talk is over. Shall I have your ear now?
Rob: By achieving what Keller wasn’t able to, you’re still nothing more than an imitation. You haven’t had any idea of your own, you’re merely following him! With that, you can hardly surpass the original.
Williams: (Williams hits Rob) Shut up!
Rob: Damn… I’m sure my skull got broken with that, this airhead of a psycho! Since I’m going to get attacked anyway, I’ll just say what I want to. The only thing which can render me speechless is a sweet kiss!
I won’t shut up… why did you come to my place? You should be killing another woman instead. To mess up the order, you’re a failure as a copycat. Can’t you even copy properly?
Williams: Isn’t it your fault that my plans were messed up?! Saying that you would give him your ear! My plans were foiled because you tempted Keller! Someone like you… I’ll kill you right now!
Rob: I can’t… has my time run out? Ah… Joshua, it’s too bad. You might have become someone precious to me too…
Williams: Die! (Gunshot) Ouch!
Joshua: Rob! Are you all right?
Rob: Joshua… somehow… I don’t have any life-threatening injuries… Rather than that, move this away, he’s too heavy.
Williams: Save… me…
Rob: Huh? So he’s alive.
Joshua: I only shot him on the right side, he won’t die immediately. Paco and the ambulance will arrive soon, hang in there.
Rob: Yea, anyway why did you return suddenly?
Joshua: When I was on my way to the police, Paco called me saying “Rob was behaving strangely so return immediately”. I’m sorry!
Rob: Why are you wearing such an expression?
Joshua: I’m very sorry! If I were with you, you wouldn’t have such an injury…
Rob: What are you saying? Haven’t you protected me? I’m alive, and my ears are still on me. Look, I’m fine right?
Joshua: Yes… you’re all right. Thank goodness… I… I made it in time right? I was able to protect you right?
Rob: That’s right, it’s all thanks to you. By the way, you aren’t the same as Kevin Costner, are you?
Joshua: Huh?
Rob: Just because you were able to protect me, don’t disappear right after this.
Joshua: Rob…
Rob: You aren’t gay, that’s why I won’t ask for you to give me an answer immediately. But, if there are any slight feelings of love towards me in your heart, I hope that you can give me some time. I want to know more about you, without any rush or anxiety. I want to take my time and know everything about you.
Joshua: Rob… I… I…
Rob: Huh? My senses are… it can’t be true… I’m at a good part too…
I’m sorry… Joshua… wake me up when the ambulance is here.
Joshua: Huh? Rob?
Rob: I’ll be fine… I just feel a little sleepy…
Rob: To be welcoming my guests with delivery pizza, this is rather unacceptable for me. I can cry about this.
Yuuto: You’re still saying that? Today is the celebration for your discharge from hospital. Also, Dick and I are huge fans of Papa Jones pizza, to the extent that we can eat it every day without getting sick of it. Isn’t that right, Dick?
Dick: If I were to choose, I would prefer Domino’s pizza… Ah, no. Of course I’m a fan of Papa Jones right now.
Neto: A man without his own opinions will get hated.
Dick: A man without any sense of cooperation will get hated more.
Neto: Sense of cooperation huh? In your case, you just don’t want to get hated by Yuuto right?
Tonya: Neto, if you bully Dick too much, you will get hated by Yuuto.
Neto: That will be troubling.
Yuuto: You won’t get hated for something like that. By the way Paco, has the copycat confessed?
Paco: Not yet. The doctor has posed limitations on his visiting hours and our inquiry sessions haven’t proceeded as planned. But we’ve gathered our evidence so it will be fine. I will definitely make him spit it out.
Rob: It has been 4 days since then, and victim Anna Jackson’s left ear and her belongings were seized from Williams’ house. Besides that, a large number of letters written by Keller were found. On the other hand, Keller whom Williams attempted to murder remains in coma.
Mike: But, thanks to sensei, this case ended without the victim count increasing. Oh, this is really tasty.
Rob: I didn’t do anything worthy of being thanked. I just accidentally reeled the culprit in, the one who suppressed Williams was Joshua.
Yuuto: It’s also all thanks to Joshua that we can have pizza like this with Rob.
Joshua: (Joshua laughs) That is…
Rob: My my, Joshua, I acknowledge your effort, but its written all over your face that you’re trying your hardest to laugh.
Yuuto: But Rob, doesn’t your wound still hurt? You should have stayed in hospital longer.
Rob: No way, I hate hospitals. As long as I don’t behave recklessly, there will be no impact on my daily life. Also, it seems like Joshua will remain at my house for a while longer too. Right, Joshua?
Joshua: Yes. I will help Rob out until my break over because Rob’s injury is my fault.
Tonya: Now everyone, Rob hasn’t fully recovered yet. Shall we leave soon?
Yuuto: That’s right. Joshua, I’m really glad that you became Rob’s bodyguard. Once again, let me thank you. Thank you for protecting my precious close friend.
Joshua: N-no it’s nothing.
Yuuto: Rob, recover quickly and let me eat good food soon.
Rob: Yea, I’ll have you de-vein the prawns then.
Yuuto: I’ll practice for that. Bye then!
Rob: Isn’t he a good person?
Joshua: Yea, he really is. Dick said this before, that he managed to get a new lease of life after meeting Yuuto.
Rob: It’s true that Dick’s current life is all thanks to Yuuto. He’s a fortunate man, it’s rare to have such a life-changing encounter.
Joshua: You’re right. That is, Rob, I’ll tell you my conclusion.
Rob: Out of the sudden?
Joshua: Can’t I?
Rob: No, it’s all right. Please say it.
Joshua: I will say my feelings honestly. No matter how hard I think about it, I’m not gay. That’s why I can’t become your lover.
Rob: That’s right, thinking about it calmly, it’s obvious that things would come to this.
Joshua: I get it, it’s too bad but I will respect your feelings. But, you will be my friend right?
Rob: I can’t be your friend either.
Joshua: Jo-Joshua, I’m sorry but can you go home? To be rejected by you is one thing, but I never imagined that I would be denied my friendship with you. Honestly, I can’t bear it.
Rob: Rob, please wait. I still have more to say.
Joshua: Is that so, then say it.
Rob: It’s fine, baby. I will listen to anything so just torment me as much as you want.
Joshua: I can’t become friends with you because I like you. Because, if I become your friend, I’d have to smile and congratulate you when you get a lover right? It’s probably impossible for me. If I look at your lover who’s treasured by you, I’ll probably get jealous.
Rob: Joshua… you are contradicting your own words. You aren’t gay right? Then why will you get jealous?
Joshua: I’m sorry for phrasing it in a confusing manner. But, it’s truly my feelings. I’m attracted by you. You said that you wanted to know me more, I was very happy about that because I felt the same way. I want to know more about you, I want to spend more time with, that’s how I feel from the bottom of my heart. But I don’t know if I’m able to have a relationship with a man. Can I overcome a huge obstacle with just the feelings of love? I don’t know that yet. With such ambiguous feelings, I can’t say that I want to become your lover. Because that would be too irresponsible right?
Rob: Joshua…
Joshua: I’m sorry, for not being able to say anything definite.
Rob: No, that’s enough. Thank you Joshua.
That’s right, wasn’t I the one who said that he doesn’t have to give me an answer right away? That’s why Joshua didn’t hide a shred of his feelings. He accepted my feelings properly and above all, he said that he likes me.
Say, can I hug you?
Joshua: Yes.
Rob: Don’t be scared, I won’t attack you. Even if I wanted to, I can’t do so in my current state.
Joshua: I’m not afraid, because I’m stronger than you.
Rob: That’s right. I’m a pathetic man who can’t even kiss you without your permission. But, I’ve been given the right to chase after you. Is it fine for me to think that way?
Joshua: Yes. Rob? I know that I’m being selfish, but please give me time. Please. I don’t think I’ll let you wait for long.
Rob: Yea, I’ll wait as long as you want me to, until you can accept my feelings wholly.
Of course, I actually want us to love each other right now. But, let’s nurture this love tenderly without rushing.
So Joshua, there’s no rush but try to become mine as soon as possible.

Deadlock Series (20)
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Track 5

Joshua: My my… Yuutee, even if you looked at me like that, I can’t give this meat to you. Yuuto said that you can’t eat human food. Do you understand? Look, it’s your master.
Tonya: Oh, Neto!
Neto: Leave it to me, Tonya!
Dick: Go Yuuto!
Yuuto: All right! We did it!
Joshua: Rob invited me over saying that they’ve borrowed a close friend’s beach house, I feel like I’ve come to the wrong place.
Rob: Although everyone just ate, they can sure move around. What tough guys.
Joshua: Rob…
Rob: Joshua, how is it? Are you going to join in?
Joshua: No, I’m bad at teamwork.
Rob: That’s right, I can’t imagine you giving another person a high-five after nailing an attack.
Joshua: You’re right…
Rob: Joshua, that wasn’t sarcasm, I was just teasing you. I love your awkwardness too, do you know?
Joshua: I do not.
Rob: Well, that’s fine. But please just understand that I love you, all right?
Joshua: I understand that, since before.
Rob: Then I’m glad, I feel relieved.
Joshua: Rob’s smile is too attractive and I’m bad at dealing with it. I’m always disappointed with myself when I can’t return the smile properly. It’s been a month since he told me that he loves me, we’re still continuing the ambiguous relationship between a close friend and lover.
Joshua (flashback): Please give me some time, I probably won’t let you wait for long.
Joshua: Despite having said that, I have yet to give him my answer. Rob’s an adult, that’s why he didn’t press for my answer or be pushy about it.
Tonya: Goodness, I sweated a lot! Everyone got so serious about it.
Rob: Everyone worked hard.
Neto: After we’ve rested, let’s play another game.
Tonya: I’m done with it, Joshua or professor, won’t you switch places with me?
Rob: All right, then I shall team up with Neto next.
Yuuto: We did it Dick, it’s going to be our win next.
Rob: Hey hey, aren’t you the rude one? Although I don’t look like it, I’m good at volleyball! Just to tell you, if you think that it’s going to be an easy win for you, that’s a huge mistake.
Dick: That Yuutee, why won’t he leave Joshua’s side?
Tonya: He wants the meat, what a smart one. Because he got some during the barbecue, he’s hoping for seconds.
Dick: Because this boy is gluttonous…
Rob: Oh, they’re selling ice cream over there. Does anyone want any?
Tonya: I’ll go with you.
Yuuto: Yuutee, you should exercise too. Dick, let’s give him a walk.
Dick: Yea, you’re right. Come here, Yuutee.
Neto: Joshua, professor is a good man. I respect him from the bottom of my heart.
Joshua: Is that so…
Neto: He’s an intelligent man, but he’s also got a strong pride. When it’s something against his beliefs, he’ll abstain from it even if it takes its toll on him.
Joshua: Neto, what are you trying to say?
Neto: Hm… No matter how painful the unrequited love is for professor, he will want to show that he’s at ease with it. Because he’s obviously a stubborn one.
Joshua: Rob is…?
Neto: He might seem fine in front of you, but the professor right now is pushing himself. Despite how he looks, he’s quite delicate. Try your best to be nice to him.
Joshua: Rob is pushing himself? He doesn’t look that part at all.
Neto: Oh, Yuutee started swimming!
Yuuto: Aren’t you good at it, Yuutee?
Dick: That’s because he’s brought up by the sea.
Rob: That’s a scene I want to photograph.
Tonya: Really, what a happy-looking couple. Say, Neto, when you look at Yuuto and Dick, don’t you feel like plunging into a wonderful relationship too?
Neto: I’ll pass, relationships are tiring.
Tonya: What tires Neto is the selfishness of women right? At this rate, you’ll never be able to marry.
Neto: That’s none of your business. You too, you should hurry and find an available man quickly.
Tonya: Goodness!
Neto: Ouch.
Rob: By the way, I held a lecture in a meeting room at LAPD.
Yuuto: Could it be for the SWAT team?
Rob: Yea, it was to build up the skills of the negotiation team and they learned from me as a specialist. I shouldn’t say this, but I was rather disappointed. After the lecture, we did a simulation with me as the criminal and it was terrible.
Yuuto: The negotiation team huh? I heard that it’s full of youngsters lacking in experience as the veterans had tendered their resignations one after another.
Tonya: Professor, this isn’t a time for lectures. Let’s talk about more interesting things. For example… your first love? What was Robbie boy’s first experience?
Rob: What? My first experience? Why do you want to hear about something which happened so long ago?
Tonya: Because it’s the love expert, professor Conners’ love story!
Neto: That’s right, I’d love to hear about it too.
Yuuto: I want to hear it too!
Dick: Same here.
Rob: Well… I see. If you really want to know about it that badly, I’ll tell you. My first experience was when I was fourteen, the other party was my sister’s boyfriend and he was quite a good-looking one.
Yuuto: What? You snatched your sister’s boyfriend? You’re horrible.
Tonya: I totally agree, what a terrible person.
Rob: I know, I know. I acknowledge that I did something bad, but I was still a child then so I couldn’t control myself properly then. Isn’t it fine already? Since I’ve said mine, it’s everyone’s turn now. What is it? You guys are being unfair! Making me the only one who talks, this is too unfair! I lost out by telling the truth honestly!

Deadlock Series (21)

Joshua: Rob, aren’t you tired?
Rob: No, not at all. I’m just a little sleepy. If you’re uncomfortable with sharing the room with me, I can sleep in another room. I thought you might not be able to fall asleep with me by your side.
Joshua: I can sleep soundly even with you beside me, you don’t have to worry about me.
Rob: Hah, you’re really heartless. Am I that little of a threat?
Joshua: Huh? He wasn’t teasing me, he was really thinking for me…
Rob: That is, I know that you can suppress me with one hand even if I attacked you. But it really hurts when the one I love isn’t even conscious of me.
Joshua: Ah… Rob, you’re wrong. It’s not like you aren’t a problem…
Rob: It’s fine, don’t push yourself. I’m not angry. Goodnight.
Joshua: What should I do? What can I do? It’s always like that. Even though I don’t mean any harm, my actions always displease others.
Rob: Joshua? What’s wrong? You look rather solemn.
Joshua: Aren’t you angry?
Rob: I just acted like I was sulking, because I wanted some attention from you.
Joshua: I thought you were really hurt and was panicking… you’re a mean person.
Rob: Joshua, come over here for a while. Don’t worry, I won’t do anything strange.
Joshua: Please stop saying things like that! I’m not a naïve girl, and much less of a frightened lamb!
Rob: I’m sorry. You’re manly, way more than I am. I’m saying unnecessary things because I harbour ulterior motives. When they try to conceal their guilt, men will talk more. Although I decided to wait till you are certain of your feelings, I’m no good. If I speak honestly, I’m always yearning for you. I’m desperate just to suppress my urges.
Joshua: It doesn’t seem that way, you always look like an adult at ease.
Rob: On the surface yes. But my heart is in a mess, it is always getting tossed around by you.
Joshua: You’re too kind, even though you can afford to be more forceful. If you really demanded for it, I’m sure I won’t be able to reject you.
Rob: Am I being seduced?
Joshua: I don’t mind if you take it that way.
Rob: I’m happy about your determination, but let’s stop here for tonight. I don’t want to force you.
Joshua: I’m not being forced.
Rob: I wonder. Do you really think that you want me? That’s not the case. What’s pushing you, is the sense of duty and guilt, it’s not feelings of love or lust.
Joshua: That’s true, but it’s not as if I don’t have any romantic feelings towards him. To be able to say it firmly…
So you can see through anything huh?
Rob: Joshua, don’t get angry. My wish isn’t to sleep with you, what I want is your heart. I want to wait until you start to yearn for me by yourself.
Joshua: What if that doesn’t happen? Even though I like you, I’m not gay. I don’t hate it when you touch me, and I think I can probably accept that sort of actions. Despite that, it’s a different matter if you talk about me taking the initiative to want to sleep with men.
I’m saying something terrible. But what I’m capable of doing now, is to convey my feelings clearly.
I’m sorry for not being able to choose my words.
Rob: It’s fine, because I love your straightforwardness. Think about it until you’re convinced, there’s no need to rush.
Joshua: Yes.
Rob: I’m thirsty, I’ll go get something to drink. You can rest first.
Joshua: Even though I like him, why? At first I thought it was because I’m not gay. But, that’s not it. There might be a more fundamental reason. In actual fact, I feel that the only one whom I’ve loved from my heart was only my sister, my sister Sherry who was killed by Thomas Keller.
Joshua: Ah!
Mother: Oh no…
Father: Joshua… You did it again, pull yourself together! (Father slaps Joshua)
Joshua: He’s kind towards people outside, but when he’s at home, he’s a frighteningly violent man. That was my father, Charles. My mother couldn’t do anything except to fear his violence. In place of that mother, my sister Sherry was the one who protected me.
Sherry: Papa, I’m sorry! Joshua isn’t at fault, it was my fault for putting the cup in front of Joshua. Joshua is only six!
Father: Age doesn’t matter! Or rather, it’s important to educate him when he is young! Joshua, say that you won’t ever do it again. You won’t say it?! (Father strikes Joshua)
Sherry: Papa, stop it!
Joshua: Perhaps it was due to my family circumstances, I stopped talking. While my hatred towards my father built up, I continued wearing my expressionless mask. That sort of lifestyle ended when I was in high school. My mother died of sickness and father passed away in a car accident, Sherry and I were entrusted to our relatives and we moved to DC. I was able to have close friends and a girlfriend over there and I started changing bit by bit. But, just a few years later, Sherry was killed by Thomas Keller. 

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Track 6

Joshua: It’s been a week since that day off. Since then, perhaps it was because Rob hasn’t contacted me, I keep thinking about unnecessary things. Am I someone worthy of Rob? I can’t trust people, I let my guard down in front of others. Is this my father’s fault, that I’ve been suppressing my emotions since young?
Rob: (Rob knocks on car window and Joshua winds window down) Since you won’t come out, I got worried and came to get you.
Joshua: Rob? Did you know that I’m here?
Rob: Yea, I can always recognise the sounds of your car engine anywhere. Come, please enter.
Rob: To think that you’d come over by yourself, I’m happy. What’s with this sudden visit?
Joshua: I was nearby so I thought I would drop by.
Rob: I see. If you’re not against it, can I bring that topic up again? The one we were talking about at the beach house.
Joshua: I don’t mind. Please go ahead.
Rob: Thank you. Actually, there’s something which has always bugged me. I was seduced by you in the bedroom right? (Joshua chokes and coughs) I’m sorry, I’m not teasing you, I’m seriously talking about this so please listen without getting angry. You think it’s all right to sleep with me. Of course, I understand that it’s a decision you forced yourself to arrive at. So, if I seriously forced myself on you, you won’t reject me?
Joshua: Yes…
Rob: But you won’t say that you would become my lover. Does that mean that you’re fine with sex but you don’t want a serious relationship?
Joshua: Indeed, he isn’t wrong. But… the way he’s phrasing it, it sounds as though I’m an advocate of lust.
Rob: Huh? Are you angry?
Joshua: I’m not angry. Please continue.
Rob: Really? Then I won’t stop. I thought that you were hesitant because of sexuality issues. To put it bluntly, it’s hard to accept the idea of having sex with men. But it seems as though you can overcome that hurdle by pushing yourself. In other words, you like me enough to overcome it. Am I wrong?
Joshua: You aren’t wrong.
Rob: Despite that, you don’t want to become my lover. No matter what, I just don’t understand that.
Joshua: I didn’t say anything about not wanting to become your lover.
Rob: Then, you really want to become my lover?
Joshua: Yes. That’s what I think.
Rob: No matter how much I think, I can’t understand. What’s holding you back from making your decision? I’m fine with waiting, but somehow it feels like your feelings fell into a stalemate and it bothers me. Haven’t you gotten rather down by blaming yourself for not being able to take the step forward?
Joshua: Rob… I’m someone who’s not suited for love. To be honest, I haven’t had a proper relationship till today. Although I’m 29 years old, isn’t that strange?
Rob: It’s not strange, but you went out with women before right?
Joshua: Yes. But that was because the other party wished for it, I was always passive. Since young, I was never good at having intimate relationships with others. It’s probably my father’s fault.
Rob: Your father huh… if you don’t mind, can I hear the reason behind your rationale?
Joshua: That is…
I shall try to tell him, if it’s this person, if it’s Rob, he might be able to understand me.
Rob: And?
Joshua: “And”? Haven’t you been listening to me?
Rob: I’ve been listening, but what do you want to do?
Joshua: What… do I want to do?
Rob: Yes, you became uncomfortable at dealing with people and it was undoubtedly due to the fact that your relationship with your father wasn’t good. You understand that rationale, but you only understood it and you aren’t doing anything about it. If you want to change yourself, you have to take a step forward.
Joshua: What he’s saying is true, but that’s not what I wanted him to say.
I’m not looking to be counselled, I just wished to be understood.
Rob: I understand, I said that because I understood. Say, Joshua, there’s always a theoretical gap where everyone creates a wall between themselves and others. But, just by looking at the wall and sighing, nothing will change. You have to work for it.
Joshua: Even though you’re saying that I have to work, I don’t know what I should do.
Rob: Joshua, it’s not good to give up thinking like that. Your father might have made the worst mistake as someone’s father, but it’s all in the past. For your own sake, you should stop being hung up over it. If you get caught up in the past, you will miss your chance at being happy.
Joshua: I’ve had enough! You don’t understand a single thing about my feelings!
Rob: That’s right, there’s no way I can understand others’ feelings. But by wanting to understand and wanting to be understood, we can both work for it.
Newscaster: … The condemned prisoner Keller is still in the hospital, but he will return to prison in a few days.
Joshua: Keller… The time is finally here.
Rob: That was unexpectedly quick, to kill a life they’ve finally saved, it’s extremely contradicting.
Joshua: It’s not contradictory, he has the duty to compensate his sin with his life.
Rob: Duty… huh?
Joshua: You’re against his execution right?
Rob: Yea, that wouldn’t solve the root of the problem. Execution isn’t linked to crime prevention. Also, there are more than a hundred people whose innocence was proven after they’ve been executed. Regardless of its effect, I think it’s wrong to take people’s lives.
Joshua: Then, are you saying that those who have had their loved ones murdered should just cry and comfort themselves?
Rob: No I’m not, I’m just saying that they should live and pay for their sins. Joshua, nothing will be born from hatred. The feelings of hating someone else will only hurt your heart.
Joshua: That might be the case, but I can’t forgive Keller! That man who took Sherry’s happiness, her future… I will never forgive him. That’s why when the verdict was a death sentence, I intend to witness the execution as the bereaved family.
Rob: If you think that it’s what you should do, I won’t object. But, let me just say this. No matter how much you hate the person, trying to get satisfaction from witnessing the execution will be in vain.
Joshua: He isn’t blaming me, I understand that. But…
You are a wonderful person. I know that you are a strong man who can forgive the person who killed your loved ones. But it’s impossible for me. For me, I’m more familiar with the feelings of hatred. While it’s difficult to love, it’s extremely easy to hate. (Joshua walks off)
Rob: Joshua!
Joshua: As expected, someone like me might be unworthy of you.
Joshua: This is bad, he’s got me locked on…
Yuuto: Yuutee, just leave Joshua’s side already. You’re a persistent one too, will you do all that just because you got meat from him once?
Dick: The meat back then was probably very tasty. Or perhaps, just perhaps, did he fall in love with Joshua?
Yuuto: Such a food-loving dog which is attracted by physical looks isn’t our dog! Joshua, don’t worry about him and eat up. If he’s in your way, I’ll put him in the cage.
Joshua: No, it’s all right.
It’s been three days since I left Rob in that awkward manner, I was invited over for dinner, so I dropped by after work with Dick at their house.
Yuuto: Now, after dinner, it’s the basketball tournament on TV! There’s Lakers’ game today.
Yuuto: All right, they won! It’s a win! Right, Dick? To fall asleep in the middle of a Lakers game, you’re the worst! Hey, Dick, if you’re sleeping then go over to the bed! Huh? What is it? What did you say?
Dick: If you kiss me, I would go to bed.
Yuuto: Is that all right? Joshua will get disgusted…
Dick: Joshua? Ah, I’m sorry but I’ll be resting first. It got so late, you should stay over. Yuutee, come here. You’ll be sleeping over there.
Yuuto: Even though he’s desperately trying to regain his cool, it’s too late.
Joshua: When Dick is at home, is he always like that?
Yuuto: Something like that. Although he looks like that, he’s quite sloven. When I scold him too much he sulks too, he’s hard to handle. Say, Joshua, can I ask something slightly personal? It’s about Rob, what do you think of Rob?
Joshua: Why would you want to know something like that?
Yuuto: Because I’m worried, about Rob and about you. You might think of this as unnecessary concern, but if you’re worrying over anything, I’d like to be of help to you.
Joshua: Although I like Rob, I can’t seem to make the decision.
Yuuto: Because you aren’t gay?
Joshua: That’s not the biggest problem. I think I’m probably afraid of having a close relationship with people.
Yuuto: I understand, because it’s a scary thing to love others.
Joshua: Did you worry over and suffer because your relationship with Dick?
Yuuto: Of course I did, it was terrible at first. Dick and I were always disagreeing with each other and I thought that it was over countless times.
Joshua: That’s unexpected, I thought that their relationship went well right from the start.
But you didn’t give up.
Yuuto: Well, yes. I’m a stubborn person so once I’ve decided on something I never give up. I chased after Dick who ran away, and forcefully made him mine.
Joshua: (Joshua laughs) You must be kidding.
Yuuto: No, it was half the truth. A relationship before both parties convey their feelings is something extremely ambiguous and unstable. Everything always seem to flow one-way… (Yuuto laughs)
Joshua: What is it?
Yuuto: No, I’m sorry. When I recall about Rob, I just… That Rob is always so frantic in front of you, when I see that I feel like laughing.
Joshua: To Yuuto, Rob looked like he’s pushing himself too? Come to think of it, Neto said the same thing too. Could it be that it’s true?
I explained that the reason why I couldn’t make the decision to become Rob’s lover, is my distrust of other humans which was directly caused by my father. I was told to overcome it with work.
Yuuto: Sometimes Rob will say painful things with his kind face, but didn’t he say those words to you because he thought that you can do it?
Joshua: Is that so?
Yuuto: Yea. But I feel relieved.
Joshua: Huh?
Yuuto: Because I found out that you’re worrying over taking the step forward in your relationship with Rob.
Joshua: Worrying over taking the step forward? That’s right, this matter is for me to take the step forward. In the past, I would have ran away. But, I don’t want to run away from Rob because he’s the first person whom I felt to be special other than Sherry.
Dick: Although I trained so hard, with this pizza and beer, the calories which I’ve burned are coming back.
Joshua: Was it all right not to leave any for Yuuto?
Dick: It’s all right, rather than Domino’s pizza, he’s the fan of Papa Jones. For Yuuto, I’ll make something later.
Joshua: Could it be, that when Yuuto is around, you can’t order Domino’s pizza?
Dick: No, that’s not it…
Joshua: Regarding this case where the bank robber took hostages, it’s been almost three hours since the outbreak…
Dick: Seems like this case will drag on. It’s worrying that the current LAPD doesn’t have any veteran negotiator.
Joshua: Yea…
Dick: By the way, Keller’s execution has been confirmed. After Keller’s been executed, will you feel relieved?
Joshua: I don’t understand, but I think it’s a required closure. You told me before, that there was someone whom you hated enough to want to kill with your own hands.
Dick: Yea, I thought that I would definitely end his life with my hands. But it’s all in the past.
Joshua: How did you put a closure to it?
Dick: Because the other party died, I had no choice but to end it. No, that’s not it. Yuuto ended it for me. I probably couldn’t have escaped from the suffering by myself.
Joshua: Come to think of it, I’ve heard this before, that “it was his strength and kindness that saved me”.
Rob said this to me, that no matter how much I hated him, it’s pointless to gain satisfaction from the other party’s death.
Dick: That’s right, I agree with him. But Rob doesn’t understand, the cowardly feelings of wanting the other person to die despite knowing all that. It’s not because he’s lacking in imagination, but because he’s strong.
Joshua: Strong?
Dick: Yea. He’s a man with firm beliefs, especially towards crime and criminals, he faces them with above average will. Both you and I are weak. Even if we are skilled at fighting, our hearts are weak.
Joshua: You’re totally right.
Newscaster: Breaking news, regarding the besieged hostage case, we do not have the full details, but the criminal held a child and a policeman as hostages and is still continuing the stand-off.
Dick: So there’s two stand-off cases with hostages huh? LAPD must be in chaos. (Phone rings) Oh, Paco? I’m looking at the news right now, seems like things have gotten bad. Huh? What about Yuuto? The background is too noisy, I can’t hear you clearly! Can you say that once more? I get it, I’ll head over immediately. Yea I know! Then, we’ll meet later! (Dick hangs up)
Joshua: Huh? Dick, you can’t drive…
Dick: Move aside, I have to go! Yuuto is…
Joshua: Yuuto? What happened to Yuuto?
Dick: According to the news just now, the hostages were a child and a policeman right? It’s Yuuto! Yuuto became the hostage!

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Track 7

Dick: Paco!
Paco: Dick… Joshua came too?
Joshua: Because he drank alcohol, I drove him here. I’ll be careful to not get in your way, so please let me stay with Dick.
Paco: I understand. The counterattack team is positioned at the first floor of that building over there. First, let’s get in.
Paco: Chief Ward, these are my brother’s close friends. This is his roommate Dick, as he’s like family to us, I called him here. You don’t mind, do you?
Ward: Yea. Even if I said no, you probably won’t listen anyway.
Dick: So, why did Yuuto become a hostage? What on earth happened?
Paco: The name of the criminal who took Yuuto and the other person hostage is Kevin Macmillan. Half a year ago after Macmillan got laid off from work, he became an alcoholic. His wife, Casey, got fed up with him and divorced him. After that, Casey got together with her colleague Nick Dumas and they started living together. Dumas’ wife passed away early and he’s been bringing his six-year-old son, Dale, up by himself. Oh, please excuse me. (Paco lit a cigarette) Macmillan couldn’t forget his love and visited Casey, he then got into a violent dispute with Dumas. Yuuto and his partner were coincidentally conducting investigations nerby, they rushed into Dumas’ room upon hearing gunshots.
Dick: Gunshots?
Paco: Yea. When Macmillan got into the argument with Dumas, he took out a pistol and fired it. While Yuuto was trying to convince Macmillan, he managed to carry Dumas out of the house. Also, he apparently volunteered to become a hostage in exchange for Macmillan to release the child.
Dick: What reckless behaviour.
Paco: But Macmillan rejected his proposal. It seems like Yuuto didn’t give up and persisted in getting Macmillan to let him stay together with the child. Macmillan must have been frustrated to the point of screaming. He unwillingly let Yuuto into the room. That was the only possible compromise.
Ward: (Phone rings) It’s a call from Macmillan!
Stephen: Chief Ward, I’ll pick it up.
Ward: Yea, be cautious.
Paco: That man is the negotiator, Stephen Nunce. Both of you, use these earphones. You’ll be able to hear the telephone conversation.
Stephen: Hello, is that Kevin?
Kevin: Yea. What happened to that man… and where is Casey?
Stephen: Dumas is still being operated on and Casey is currently accompanying him.
Kevin: Damn it! Does that woman like him that much?! Hey, bring Casey here immediately! If you don’t bring her over, I’ll kill the hostages immediately!
Stephen: Calm down, I’ll call Casey immediately so don’t do anything stupid.
Kevin: Stupid?! During times like this, like hell will anything be considered stupid! Inform me when Casey is here, don’t call me before that! If you call me, I’ll kill the kid! (Kevin hangs up)
Ward: Stephen! Don’t anger the criminal!
Stephen: Don’t worry chief Ward, Kevin is just trying to appear superior by sounding tough.
Dick: Paco, is that young negotiator capable?
Paco: I would like to say that he is, but he’s the only negotiator we have here. Two of them are stuck at the scene of the bank robbery.
Dick: Can’t we call Rob over here? Seems like he’s even delivered a lecture to the negotiation team at LAPD before. I want him to support that negotiator.
Paco: That’s right… I get it, I’ll bring it up with my boss.
Paco: Rob, I’m sorry for calling you out suddenly.
Rob: It’s all right, don’t worry about it Paco. Dick, I think you know this already but Yuuto is someone who has a lot of luck.
Dick: Yea, that’s right.
Rob: Joshua, how are you?
Joshua: I’m so so.
Rob: Then, that’s good. In that case, can you show me the documents on the criminal and the log of their conversations so far? I want to browse through them before his divorced wife comes.
Stephen: You’re his ex-wife, Casey Dawson right? Macmillan wants to have a talk with you. Can you talk with him over the phone?
Casey: Yes, I don’t mind.
Stephen: Then, right away.
Rob: Stephen, it might be better to have a talk before that. It will be impossible to do it immediately.
Stephen: But professor Conners, as long as you don’t get her on the phone, the negotiation won’t proceed.
Rob: I understand.
Dick: Is that all right, Rob?
Rob: It can’t be helped, he’s the negotiator and at most, I’m still in the supporting role.
Stephen: Hello Kevin, it’s Stephen. Casey is here, I’ll put her on the line.
Kevin: Casey… Is that you Casey?
Casey: Yes, it’s me. Kevin, I’m begging you so please stop this already. Let Dale and the policeman go.
Kevin: Ah, Casey… why did it come to this stage? I just wanted to redo things with you! Because that man got in the way of that… I didn’t mean to shoot him, please believe me! All right, Casey?
Casey: Please stop this! You’re always like this, full of excuses.
Kevin: Casey! Don’t say that!
Casey: You never do any work and you’re always drinking… I’ve had enough of your incompetence! Unlike you, Nick is a wonderful person. Although he’s been bringing his child up alone, he doesn’t even grumble about it. Why? Why did you shoot him?!
Rob: Stephen! Grab the telephone receiver! Don’t let her speak any more!
Casey: I hate you! If he dies… I’ll hate you for the rest of my life!
Stephen: It seems like Casey is a little worked up right now, it’s enough right?
Kevin: Damn… why won’t she understand me? Say, bring Casey over here! I’m sure we’ll understand each other if we meet and talk it over. Please!
Stephen: That’s impossible, if you want to meet her, you should come out!
Kevin: Don’t be ridiculous! As if I can believe in the police! Damn, every single one of you are making fun of me. I’ll round everyone up and kill them all! (Gunshots)
Stephen: Kevin, what are those gunshots just now? Don’t tell me you killed the hostages?!
Kevin: I didn’t shoot at them, but the next time you anger me, I’ll shoot the policeman! Remember that. Also, I won’t talk with you anymore. I’ll converse with another person. (Kevin hangs up)
Stephen: Did it have the opposite effect to get Casey to talk to him?
Rob: It’s more effective to get a close relative to talk with him, but it has to be done with prudence. Her lover was shot by her ex-husband and nearly died. On top of that, her ex-husband has caused a huge ruckus by taking hostages and hiding in a room. It’s obvious that her emotions will be unstable if she speaks to Macmillan under such circumstances.
Stephen: In other word, I made the wrong choice?
Rob: No, you didn’t make the wrong choice, you only did it the wrong. So don’t make such a face, the negotiation has just begun.
Stephen: No, I couldn’t persuade Macmillan, I’ve been hated by him.
Rob: Hey hey, don’t say that. Are you going to give up midway?
Stephen: Chief Ward, I have a request. Please let me exchange the negotiation role with professor Conners. I will switch to the supporting role. I’m still incapable.
Ward: I get it. Professor Conners, can you help us?
Rob: Erm… is it fine for an outsider like me to do this? This might cause problems for you.
Ward: I don’t mind, I want to avoid a forced entry at any cost.
Rob: I understand, then I shall give my best.
Kevin: Who is it?
Rob: Mr Macmillan? Pleased to meet you, I’m Rob Conners. From now on, I will be the one talking with you. If you’d like to, please call me Rob.
Kevin: All right, so it’s Rob? Then, you can call me Kevin. Rob, I want food. Also, alcohol too.
Rob: I’ll ask my superiors.
Kevin: What?! Can’t you make your own decision since it’s just food and drinks?
Rob: Although I’ve been tasked with the negotiation, I’m not the person who bears the responsibility. If I answer to your request without consulting anyone, and the request can’t be fulfilled, I will disappoint Mr Macmillan. That’s why, no matter what sort of request it is, I can’t give you a “yes” immediately. Please understand.
Kevin: That can’t be helped. Then, go check with your higher-ups. Call me in five minutes’ time.
Rob: I understand, five minutes then. (Rob hangs up) Chief Ward, can you prepare burger and some drinks?
Ward: Yea, I’ll let them prepare it immediately, but alcohol is a no go.
Rob: Yes, I understand.
Joshua: What’s the use of letting the criminal know that you don’t have any authority?  If it doesn’t go well, he might look down on you, thinking that you are powerless.
Rob: That might happen, but it’s fine. By telling him right from the start that I have no authority to make decisions, it can become an excuse when the time comes. I can say that “I agree with you, but my superiors say no”, “I want to do that too, but I can’t get the permission to”. By doing that, it won’t spoil my relationship with the criminal right?
Joshua: You’re right, by doing that, the negotiation will get easier.
Rob: That’s how it is. Also, when we accede to his requests, we also let him accede to one of ours. I hope it goes well though.
Rob: Mr Macmillan? It’s Rob. I talked with my superiors. I can give you burgers and drinks, but the alcohol was refused. I’m very sorry.
Kevin: Why can’t I have it?! Just one bottle of whisky is good enough!
Rob: Unfortunately I didn’t get the permission from my superior. Also, I think it’s not good to drink alcohol in your current condition. You’re currently very composed. If possible, I’d like you to remain that way. It’s for your sake too, please understand, Kevin.
Kevin: I got it.
Rob: By the way, before I bring the food over, I have a request to make as well. It’s a very simple thing. Is it possible for me to talk with the policeman who’s being held hostage? His family is very worried. Just a short while is good enough, please.
Kevin: It can’t be helped, just a while!
Yuuto: Hello?
Rob: Hey Yuuto, it’s me Rob. Due to certain reasons, I’ve been tasked with the negotiation. Wait a minute, I’ll pass it over to Paco.
Paco: Yuuto, have you been hurt? We’ll definitely save you, so just wait. Got it? Don’t be reckless!
Yuuto: All right, I’ll believe in everyone and wait. Both Dale and I are all right, so don’t worry.
Paco: I got it, Dick is here too. I’ll pass the phone over to him.
Dick: Yuuto, I’m here too. I’m waiting for your return.
Yuuto: Dick… I’m sorry for worrying you. Dick, I have a favour to ask of you. Can you tell this to my lover? I’ll definitely come back so don’t worry, and that I love you from the bottom of my heart.
Dick: Yea, I’ll pass the message. I’m sure your lover will have the same thing to say to you, that you’re loved too.
Kevin: Isn’t it enough? I’m hanging up!
Rob: I understand, you’ve always been living with the unbearable humiliation.
Kevin: That’s right. Even though I’ve always been working seriously, I was suddenly sacked from my job due to the recession. On top of that, I was divorced from my wife. I had that gun, not because I wanted to shoot him. I was planning to show him the gun to shut him up if that man appeared and got in the way of my talk with Casey. He was shot on impulse during the dispute, I wasn’t aiming for him!
Rob: Yes, I understand. You had no intentions to kill.
Joshua: It has been two hours since then and the idle chat continues. Rob hasn’t commenced anything close to a negotiation with Macmillan. Is it really all right? It seems like the policemen are getting impatient too…
Kevin: Rob, my life is over. Damn it… why did it turn out to be like this?
Rob: Kevin, I’ve got good news for you. Nick Dumas has regained consciousness. Although you fired a gun, you didn’t kill anyone. This is the silver lining in the cloud.
Kevin: Either way, I’ll get caught by the police and be put in prison right? Isn’t that right?
Rob: The possibility of that is high, but your life isn’t over just because you’re going to prison. You might suffer for a few years, but you will regain your freedom after that. That’s why you can’t think that it’s over.
Kevin: Is that so… Even though it has come to this stage, can I still redo things?
Rob: Yes, of course. You aren’t an evil person. I’m begging you, please think that your future can still be continued. Kevin, I’ll be hanging up for now. I will call you again in ten minutes. All right? (Rob hangs up)
Ward: Professor Conners, since the incident occurred, five hours has passed. You have yet to get the criminal to surrender. What is the meaning of this?
Rob: I’m sorry, because I don’t want to fail, I’m taking a prudent approach. By the way, if you were to rate Macmillan’s trust in me, how much percentage do you think it is at? I don’t mind if it’s just your personal opinion.
Ward: I see, isn’t it at around 65%?
Stephen: I think it’s over 75%, the current Macmillan is relying on professor Conners.
Rob: That’s a pleasing opinion. I wanted an objective opinion on whether his reliance on me can overcome his distrust. With this, I’ve gained confidence. With my next phone call, I’ll urge him to surrender.
Paco: Rob! Take a look at the TV! The forced entry has begun on the other side!
Newscaster: Just a moment ago, a huge move was made. The forced entry by the SWAT team has probably begun. I repeat…
Stephen: What bad timing, if Macmillan is watching the TV now…
Rob: Even so, there’s nothing we can about it. Since it has come to this, we should urge him to surrender immediately. Under such a situation, I don’t want to give Macmillan time.
Rob: Hello, Kevin. Is it all right to talk now?
Kevin: Yea. What is it?
Rob: Here’s a proposition from me. Why don’t you come out from there soon? Isn’t it tough for you to do this during such a painful period? It will be fine, you don’t have to worry. You will be physically restrained by the police, but since it’s already gotten late, the inquiry will be tomorrow. Have your dinner and rest for tonight…
Kevin: I don’t want that! I’m not going out! Once I go out, I will be shot! I just saw it on the news! That bank robbers were suppressed, and every single one of them were shot dead! I’m going to die in that manner too…
Rob: Kevin, then why don’t we do this? I will go over there. I will go get you alone.
Kevin: You will… come here?
Rob: That’s right. When we get out, both me and the policeman over there will guard you on both sides, sticking right by your side. If we do that, nobody will be able to shoot you.
Kevin: Is that…
Rob: How does that sound, Kevin? In any case, I’ll be heading over so can you let me into the room? Please.
Kevin: I understand, come alone. If you bring anyone else along, I won’t forgive you.
Rob: I promise. (Rob hangs up)
Stephen: This is absurd, professor Conners. What will we do if you become the hostage?
Rob: I won’t, I believe in Macmillan. He will invite me into the room and after that, he will join arms with me and come out to the open. Definitely.
Stephen: There’s no “definite” in negotiation! In the first place, you should know well enough how dangerous it is to go in.
Rob: Even so, I’ll still go. If I don’t believe in him, who will believe in him? Right now, I am the only one who is the closest to him. I am the only one who can bring him out. Joshua, can you come over for a while? I want to talk in private with you.
Joshua: Ah… yes.
Rob: Joshua, are you angry?
Joshua: Yes, I’m angry. Why are you always acting recklessly? You can just leave the job of risking your own life to the police.
Rob: Since I’ve accepted the negotiation task, I have the responsibility. I want to save Macmillan.
Joshua: Why? Macmillan is the criminal! Since he’s a criminal, you don’t have to go to such lengths…
Rob: In the last few hours, I didn’t interact with Macmillan thinking that he’s a hateful criminal. I treated him with utmost respect and sincerity while thinking that he’s someone I must save. Do you know why? It’s to gain his trust. First I have to trust him, then get him to trust me. Using that as a turning point, the relationship between people will proceed in the desired direction.
Joshua: Rob… it’s almost as if… he’s saying it to me when he says that, to not fear trusting people.
Rob: Why do you trust people that easily?
Joshua: It isn’t easy, but I’ve decided to believe in him, that’s all there is to it.
I see, it’s not because he’s kind or that he’s a good person. Rob made his decision, to believe Macmillan. That is how it is to trust in others, to brush aside the uneasiness that you might be betrayed and to stick to your conviction. It can’t be done if you aren’t strong.
I’m begging you, please be sure to come back safely.
Rob: Yea, of course. I love you, Joshua. It would be better if you stayed here for a while longer.
Joshua: Huh?
Rob: Because I kissed you, your lips have gotten red. Also, your eyes are teary and your cheeks are ruddy. If you went out looking like that, it will be obvious that I did something naughty to you.
Joshua: Wha… Rob…
Rob: Then, I’ll get going.

Deadlock Series (23)
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Track 8

Man: Listen up! Professor Conners has entered the apartment. The spearhead team and sniper team, be on stand-by there! Do not make any moves unless you’re ordered to!
Joshua: It’s the same, when Rob was attacked by Williams. Back then, I prayed for Rob’s safety too. But right now, Rob is much more important to me. Although I like him so much, why can’t I… I want to take the step forward. So Rob, please return here. I’m begging you.
Man: Look! Someone came out.
Paco: It’s Rob! With Yuuto… and the child is there too!
Stephen: The criminal and the hostages, everyone is safe! Professor Conners succeeded in the negotiation! (Everyone claps and cheers)
Dale: Casey!
Casey: Dale! Were you scared? It’s all right now.
Paco: Mr Dawson, please get onto the ambulance with Dale. Yuuto, get onto the other ambulance too. Dick, accompany Yuuto.
Yuuto: Me too? I’m not injured anywhere.
Paco: No, get yourself checked at the hospital.
Yuuto: I got it. By the way, Dick. Did you pass that message to my lover?
Dick: Yea. Don’t worry, I passed it.
Rob: Wow, this is such a touching scene. Let me in too…
Yuuto: It’s hard to breathe, Rob. But, thank you. Once again, you saved me.
Rob: I’m a reliable man right? Are you regretting jilting me?
Yuuto: I’m sorry but I don’t regret at all.
Rob: Is that so? It’s fine, I was stupid for asking. Come on, get onto the ambulance quick.
Yuuto: Yea, see you then.
Rob: On top of getting a lift from you, I’m even letting you make coffee for me. I’m sorry.
Joshua: No it’s fine, you look like you’re tired.
Rob: Yea, I’m definitely tired out tonight.
Joshua: I want to talk frankly with him, about my current feelings. But, I guess I should choose another day for this?
I’ll go home, sorry for intruding.
Rob: Huh? Already? Isn’t it still early?
Joshua: Is… is that so? Then, I’ll stay for a while longer.
Rob: Yea, do that. Why don’t you stay over? Do you have to get to work early tomorrow?
Joshua: No, my work starts in the afternoon.
Rob: I see. By the way, your cheeks are flushed, did you catch a cold or something?
Joshua: That’s not it.
Rob: Then, I’m glad.
Joshua: This man, despite being a specialist in psychology, why only during times like this…
I’m blushing because you told me to stay over. Even though you might not mean anything by it, I wished you had made your inference about it.
Rob: Huh? But you’re totally fine even if I sleep next to you right? Didn’t you say so at the beach house, that you can sleep soundly even if I’m by your side.
Joshua: That was because I thought you were teasing me, so I said something stubborn carelessly.
Rob: Then, are you conscious of me? Do you get nervous thinking about what you should do if I push myself on you? That’s got to be a lie, you always look hatefully at ease in front of me.
Joshua: That’s just my face. Even though I look like this, my heart is pounding. Even now… feel this. (Joshua puts Rob’s hand on his chest)
Rob: You’re right, it’s pounding.
Joshua: Ah… I’m sorry! I took it so seriously like an idiot…
Rob: It’s all right, get more serious about it. Your angry face is very attractive too, I can’t take my eyes off it.
Joshua: Say Rob, can you listen to what I have to say?
Rob: Yea, I’m listening.
Joshua: You said that I wasn’t putting in effort, that I made it my father’s fault. It means that I wasn’t seriously facing the problem I caused, right?
Rob: That’s right. If you’re really worried about your spiritual well-being, you wouldn’t have said that. It’s true that you’re shouldering various problems, but your heart isn’t sick. Because someone who seriously rejects contact with others won’t choose a job as a bodyguard. Are you done talking? Ah… ouch! Don’t be so violent towards me.
Joshua: I’m sorry! But I still have more to say, please behave yourself and listen.
Rob: I got it, please say.
Joshua: Then, I’ll start from my conclusion.
Rob: Again? Ah no, it’s fine. Say what you want.
Joshua: Please let me be your lover, from today… no, from this moment onwards.
Rob: So you finally made your decision?
Joshua: Yes, I love you. I finally became honest with myself. I’m sorry for making you wait.
I actually have more things to say, but right now, it’s fine to just let him understand my feelings of love.
Rob: I’m happy, it’s as though I’m in a dream. But are you really not forcing yourself?
Joshua: I’m not! That is… if possible, tonight…
Rob: What about tonight? Don’t tell me that you want to stay in my arms?
Joshua: No… that is… it’s fine! You should be tired today too, let’s sleep separately.
Rob: Ha… you’re really the best. But you don’t understand men’s heart at all, do you think there are idiots who would get invited to bed by someone they love, then accept it when they’re told “let’s do it another time”?

Deadlock Series (22)

Rob: How about some wine? If you drink a little, you will be able to relax.
Joshua: I’m not really nervous or anything.
Rob: I’m envious, I’m slightly nervous. It’s rather stupid since I’m of this age already.
Joshua: I’m sorry, that was a lie. I’m a little nervous too.
Rob: Then, it’s better if you drink a little, but not till you get drunk though. (They kiss) Why are you averting your eyes?
Joshua: Ah… I don’t understand. When I gaze into your eyes, it gets painful for my heart. Even now, it feels like it’s about to explode.
Rob: Really, you’re such a… why are you so cute?
Joshua: I am… not cute at all…
Rob: No, you’re cute. You’re so cute that I feel like swallowing you whole. Hm? Did that sound like an old man’s line?
Joshua: (Joshua laughs) Rob…
Rob: You laughed, that’s a good expression. I love both your angry and embarrassed expressions, but as expected, your smile is the best.
Joshua: The smoothness of your talk is dangerous, I’ll get cautious.
Rob: How mean, I don’t lie. No matter what I say, I’m always honest.
Joshua: You’re right, you’re a man who takes responsibility for his words. (They kiss) Rob… I’m already… don’t tease me…
Rob: What do you want me to do?
Joshua: You know it already…
Rob: Even if I do, I want to make you say it. Now, say it… what do you me to do to you?
Joshua: … it…
Rob: What is it? I can’t hear you.
Joshua: Lick it… directly… please… I’m begging you…
Rob: You did well, good boy. As you wish, I’ll take good care of you.
Joshua: Rob… more… slowly… you can’t! If you do that… I’m already… It usually takes longer… Tonight is the first time I came so fast…
Rob: That means you felt that good right? You don’t have to worry about being fast or slow. This side might not go so easily, if it seems impossible, I will stop.
Joshua: N-no, I don’t mind. I’ve prepared myself.
Rob: Then, let’s give it a try. I won’t force it, so don’t worry. I won’t make you suffer. Relax, it will be fine. If it’s just my finger, it won’t hurt. Ah, Joshua…
Joshua: Please let me touch you too. Didn’t it feel good?
Rob: Ah, no, it felt great. But if you touch it too much, I’ll feel like becoming with you immediately and that can’t do, you’re not loosened up yet. How about you put it in? I have experience on both sides, so as long as you’re fine with it, I don’t mind.
Joshua: Me, towards you?
Rob: For you, would that be more natural? I guess being on the receiving end isn’t that easy, feelings-wise.
Joshua: I don’t mind as long as that’s your wish. Because when it comes to embracing each other, both ways are the same.
Rob: You are really the best. I guess I’ll be the one doing it tonight. I want to experience the happiness of making you mine strongly. I’ll do my best to be careful, but if it hurts, tell me.
Joshua: Yea, it will be fine, I’m a man. I will be fine even if you’re slightly violent towards me. Rather, I don’t want it to end without you being satisfied because you were too cautious. That’s why, you don’t have to hold back.
Rob: I can’t match up to you, you’re really manly.
Rob: Joshua, don’t hold your breath and exhale slowly. Relax and let yourself go.
Joshua: Rob… move… it will be fine. Please… taste me… properly.
Rob: I am… you’re the best. Joshua, I love you.
Joshua: Rob… I’m about to… come again…
Rob: You can come, come as many times as you like while feeling me. I’m almost there too… Joshua… Joshua…
Joshua: Thank goodness, I finally accepted everything from Rob. I shared the best happiness with Rob.
Rob: Joshua, are you all right? Did it hurt?
Joshua: It’s fine.
Rob: But your eyes are red, as expected, it hurt didn’t it? I’m sorry, even though I said that I won’t be unreasonable, I couldn’t restrain myself after getting all aroused. I’m reflecting on it.
Joshua: Rob, I really like you, I love you.
Rob: Thank you, I love you too, Joshua. I will promise you, no matter what happens, I’ll accept everything about you. That’s why, no matter what happens, you can always come to me without running away. I definitely don’t want to ruin a relationship where we can face each other right on.
Joshua: That’s right, it doesn’t matter if our opinions conflict. If it’s with Rob, I’m sure we can go anywhere together. As long as we have the feelings of trusting one another, yearning for each other… But it’s strange, to think that I’ll get into such a relationship with Rob… I still remember what happened that day clearly. Even though I’m an outsider and a student, I wanted to meet Rob badly so I went his university to attend his lecture.
Excuse me, Mr Conners, may I get an autograph?
Rob: Huh? Oh, did you read this? Was it interesting?
Joshua: Yes, it was extremely interesting and I got absorbed as I read it.
Rob: I’m happy about that. Since this is a rare chance, shall I write your name too?
Joshua: No, it’s fine, since it’s embarrassing.
Rob: You’re so shy.
Joshua: That… can I shake your hand?
Rob: Of course, here.
Joshua: Thank you. (Joshua turns to leave)
Rob: Ah, wait a minute. Do you always attend my lecture?
Joshua: Ah… yes…
Rob: I see, then I’m glad. So we’ll meet again, bye.
Joshua: It’s been five years since then, I was able to meet Rob again coincidentally.
Rob (flashback): Could it be that we’ve met before?
Joshua: When I heard that from Rob, I answered him in my heart, “So we met again, Rob. I’ve always been thinking that I want to meet you again”. I shall tell that to him one day. Since it’s Rob, I’m sure he’ll be extremely surprised. 
Rob: Joshua… seems like I’ve reached my limits. Can I sleep?
Joshua: Go ahead, sleep as much as you want.
Rob: Say, don’t go home without telling me. I want you to be by my side when I wake up in the morning.
Joshua: I won’t go home, I’ll stay by your side until you open your eyes.
Rob: You definitely have to, give me a good morning kiss and eat breakfast with me…
Joshua: Yes, everything you wish for. (Joshua kisses Rob)

Deadlock Series (15)
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