Shigatsu wa Kimi no Uso: Episode 21

– Snow

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And Kousei looks down again.

We can’t very well blame Kousei for reverting to his old self now, can we? It’s just like what Kousei said. All he ever wanted was to play the piano so that his mother would get well, all he ever did was fall in love. So why have things turned out the way they did? It really is unfair to the boy. And honestly, considering the gravity of the situation and bearing in mind his past, one really can’t fault Kousei for throwing in the towel. After all, he did try to pick himself up the second time round. He really did.

However, this time it is different. This time, Kousei has Kaori. Not just her, he also has Seto, Tsubaki (timely sneeze, you’ve finally proven yourself useful…), Watari, Emi, Takeshi, Nagi and even Mikke supporting him. Yes, this time, it is different.

When Kousei shut himself away from the light of the world, Seto walked into a familiar scene. But this time round, she reached out to him. Well, more like marched over and dragged that lump of depression known as Kousei out of his room. When Kousei clutched at his head in numbness while he was on stage, Tsubaki’s sneeze shocked him out of his reverie. It made Kousei realise that there were people watching him, that he had all these people around him who were there for him, that he was not alone. And that he should not be the one leaving Kaori all alone.

I am rather in love with the idea that Kousei was made to play Chopin’s first Ballade. Just like the last time, they could not have picked a better or more beautiful piece for Kousei to perform. Ballade No. 1 in G Minor is said to have been composed by Chopin after his arrival in Paris, the period during which he composed some of his more intense, passionate and at times tragic pieces, when the composer was reflecting about his loneliness in a place away from his beloved homeland. So this was, to me, the perfect piece for Kousei to play, because the music itself was a reflection of the inner turmoil that he was dealing with; the chaos within him – his loneliness, confusion, frustration and fear, the music. It was a musical and most mesmerising lament that captured the audience with explosive intent.

He is a musician after all, so everything has got to be expressed in music. Even if he was sad, in a total mess or he had hit rock bottom, he still has to play. Because he is a pianist; because he is a musician~

Classical music heard. Scriabin Etude Op. 8 No. 12 in D-sharp Minor~ Saint-Saëns’ Introduction et Rondo Cappricioso in A Minor~ Chopin Ballade in G Minor Op. 23. Click ♪ ♫ to listen (it has got to be Zimerman. If not, Horowitz’s performance at Carngenie Hall)~

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